When I was very little my older sister by two years and I would wake up bright and early summer mornings to play "school". The night before one of us would be the designated teacher and the other, the student. If we wanted to play discipline, the student played bad and if we wanted to really teach, the student would be good. The previous night the designated teacher would prepare a "worksheet", usually simple addition. I have no idea how long or how many times we created these elaborate classroom settings. But I do know I have wanted to be a real teacher as far back as I can remember. I want to change lives. I want to lead. I want to impact others for the better. As I grew into elementary school my teachers told me "Oh look at you! You are going to be a teacher when you grow up!" (granted they usually said that because I always put one hand on my hip and cocked it to the side. That always got me "you're going to be a teacher" attention). In high school my teachers watched me help and tutor peers and their response echoed the past "Sarah, you should REALLY think about being a teacher. You are so good at helping others learn". "That's the plan!" I thought.
I got into my first choice University whose College of Education is known for being spectacular. "Schools will hire you just because you graduated here. They know our students are the best" I heard over and over again. So, I worked my butt off. I made the dean's list almost every semester. I have a 3.6 gpa and a 4.0 gpa in my education classes. I want this and my hard work shows that. This is my dream. This dream has been on the other side of a glass door for so long. I could see it. I could feel it. I knew it was so near. I fought for this. I went through so many ups and downs to get to this point. This is what I have lived for. As I started to turn the knob to finally enter my dream, as I got accepted into the teaching program and started my first and second day of classes the door jammed. "Not quite yet" God whispered my way. "Hold on just a little bit longer. I have so much more for you". And in one conversation my dreams sneaked back behind that beckoning glass door. "I'm not done preparing you yet".
My dreams did not align with my reality. My reality has become more than just a student pursuing her dreams. My reality has become a wife whose family is far more important than any simple career dream. My family is my dream that has already come true. What a fool I would be to let this living dream be disturbed by a mere selfish desire.
In just moments a new door flew open releasing passions that had once been buried. "We'd like to hire you on full time as the whole body specialist" a Whole Foods team leader proposed. You see earlier that day I had entered into my second day of the teaching program. I had begun to read textbooks, printed out PowerPoints, and taken studious notes. "I actually was applying for the part time position" I presented. This one proposition, this one conversation began the tug of war between my heart and my mind. "Let me speak with my family and I will let you know".
I came home to discuss this with my husband. "I think you should take the job. We need you to take the job" his words resounded in my mind switching places back and forth with each and every one of our growing bills. "Buts" were all I could reply with. "But what if this is satan trying to turn me off my path" "But I only have 3 more semester until I graduate. We make money then" "But this is a REALLY good company and what if I love it so much I don't want to leave" (yes, that is a real worry! Terrible, right? ha) I turned to friends messaging them to pray for me and this decision when one brave soul spoke up.
"I think maybe you do know what to do but you don't want to... God is providing in a huge and awesome way. Take a semester off. People do it all the time. Sometimes, you have to make sacrifices for your family. This might be yours..... You've been saying you can't afford to eat healthy. Look now. Not only will you be making good money. But you'll also get a discount. God wants what is best for you and it is so evident. Walk through the door!!! You won't regret following Him ever".I did know what to do. But I was seeking reassurance for the decision I wanted to make, for the dream I wasn't ready to let go. I quickly realized that God was in all of this. He designed this. He prepared this. He wants what is best for us and He has given us what we need to thrive.
For the past 10 months I have been researching, studying, and applying natural health concepts to my life. God has been preparing me for this for almost a year!! I am not letting go of a dream. I am postponing it and living out another passion to ready me for the next. I love homeopathic remedies. I love essential oils. I love studying, learning, and most of all TEACHING about how to turn your life around to live a healthier, less chemically polluted lifestyle. My door to teaching did not close. It just shifted to another subject. A subject I am passionate about. I still get to change lives, I still get to lead, I still get to impact others for the better.
So, here I type to tell you that I am no longer enrolled as a student. I am the Whole Body Specialist at Whole Foods where I get to learn and teach about yet another passion in my life. I am doing this for my family. I am doing this for God. I am doing this for me.
Will I go back to school? I very much hope so! When will I go? That my friends is a door that has not yet been revealed to me. However, I do know that this is a wonderful season in our lives and I am excited to share it with you if you'll let me. The greatest joy you will ever know is following the plans God has designed for you. Time to buckle up and get ready for an adventurous ride!
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